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Just how much of an idiot are you?

A Reality Orientation Questionnaire For Leftists And Other Whiners

I was listening to NPR last Sunday (with the same intent that the pre-WWII Jews in Germany monitored Nazi radio programs), when I heard some idiot aging ‘punk rocker’ who was receiving some kind of an award from a Humanist church (?) sing an inspirational heartfelt song about how the world was being covered in asphalt. The tag line on the chorus of the song said, “stop!” (Making roads) Now, from what I gathered, this guy had been in the music industry for a while, made CD’s, presumably used state of the art music instruments, and had perhaps inflatable tent received some remuneration for his efforts. He is thriving within the system . . . yet, here he is denouncing the system and its materialistic values, metaphorically symbolized by the road-building process. So . . . how does he get to his gigs? If an activity like road-building is moral anathema to you, and yet you continually use them to your benefit, what is it exactly that you are trying to tell us?

Guitars, drum sets, PA systems and recording equipment do not grow on trees, nor are they the product of mining efforts by a commune of blissed-out hippies living in Colorado. Implicit in this punk rocker’s “art” are factories, power grids, a transportation system, a viable monetary system, and some sort of functional government to keep it all going. Oh, and profit is also a vital part of the existence of modern music. If evil corporations didn’t derive a profit from selling instruments to punk rockers the factories would soon retool and set their exploited workers to producing another product.

Anyway, once again, my mind went off in a scattering of thoughts about just how deeply, profoundly, stupid the left in America is. The reaction of the left in America to this dude’s musical blather is akin to the reaction normal people have to a baby; Well, never mind that his babble is meaningless nonsense, or that he’s throwing another tantrum at mommy or daddy, or that he’s shitting on the floor once again. . . “Oh, isn’t he cute, honey.” Yes. Cute for sure, and expensive beyond his worth. And if we send him for twelve years of government babysitting, indoctrination and propaganda lessons, he’ll remain expensive all of his life. This is what we are dealing with now: the boomer generation’s children and their infinitely extended self-indulgent adolescence.

It is my belief that a day will come when the majority of intelligent, functional Americans denounce Washington as tyrannical and dysfunctional beyond repair and start leaving the current urban cesspools to set up a new society and government beyond the grasp of demo-maniacs. The liberal masters will be too preoccupied to stop them since the underclass of malcontents will stand in open revolt because they can no longer suckle on the withered tits of the tax system. The underclass (those too stupid, too spoiled, or “too special” to work) and the liberals will then consume each other in an orgy of demands, incrimination, guilt, protests and riots, as the urban centers burn. Surviving liberals will slink off to sulk and write their memoirs while surviving members of the underclass will finally take menial jobs they need to survive by following the tracks of those wise enough to abandon this decrepit system.

Even though I was a liberal at one time, I’m still confused by their concepts. (Admittedly, I was confused at the time I was a liberal, and wanted to save the earth from the greedy, i.e., those who studied in school, had meaningful jobs, and were living the good life as a result). For example, their stance on the equitable distribution of goods? How come they never mention the equitable distribution of work? And how come it’s always someone else’s goods they want to distribute? Hopefully, by checking the respondents’ answers, I can codify liberal philosophy so that even non-Ivy League graduates can understand it and, as well, refute those who insist that American liberals are equivalent to a group of blathering monkeys.

All that said, here is a questionnaire for liberals. A lot of the questions concern decision making, the logical results of making decisions, and the degree to which they are committed to their stances.

Saving The Earth

1. Do you believe the building of roads should stop?

2. Do you believe no more cement, asphalt, etc., should be laid over natural habitat?

3. What materials should human shelter be made of?

4. How many square feet should be the maximum, per human, in a dwelling?

5. Should industrialization and mass production of goods be stopped?

6. Should mega-agricultural enterprises be banned?

7. What should human modes of transportation be?

8. Should human transportation be limited to self-initiative? (Walking)

9. Should humans use animal labor for transport or any other endeavor (such as plowing, pulling wheels in grinding stones, etc.)?

10. Should metals be mined from the ground, refined, and used by humanity?

11. Should plastic, which is an oil-based product, continue to be used?

12. Should any artificial product (nylon, and the like, anything not make from natural animal or vegetable fiber) be produced?

13. Should animals be a source of clothing?

14. Should animals be a source of food?

15. Should cars and gas operated vehicles be banned?

17. Should electric or alternate energy vehicles be allowed? (Assuming roads continue to be built).

18. Who should determine how the resources of the world, minerals, fuel supplies, fishing grounds, hunting areas and so on be utilized?

19. How should resources from individual former cultural, national or racial enclaves be divided and disbursed.

20. Who would control the enumeration, collection, and disbursal, of these resources?

21. How should this individual or board be picked, by whom, and in what manner?

22. If anyone disagrees with their food products, energy resources or valuable minerals being taken from them and disbursed to others, what recourse do they have?

23. What should be the punishment/s for the disobedient?

24. Who should be the ultimate arbiter of “what’s fair?” and how should they obtain this post?

25. Other than occasionally scavenging road kill, is there any instance when a human should be allowed to eat meat?

Social Goals

26. Since racial and cultural diversity is now the goal of “right” thinking people, should racial, cultural and economic mixes be mandated by a set amount in every neighborhood, community, tribe, village, town, etc.?

27. Who would determine the correct proportions of these “diversify” enclaves?

28. Should moral or social behavior be limited or controlled in any manner by a governing body of humans?

29. If so, what system should be chosen, who should codify these rules or laws, and how should they be selected?

30. What should be the limits of their ability to enforce violations or lack of compliance with the code? Imprisonment? Physical punishment? Death? Banishment?

31. Who should have authority over children? Parents, or government?

32. What should be the age at which a child is free from parental control?

33. Are diverse moral value systems and points of view allowed in your ideal world? Or just those that attack former establishment values?

34. Define the following words: Racism, Bigotry, Prejudice

35. Does bigotry always involve racism?

36. Does prejudice always involve racism?

37. Can a person of one race or culture dislike someone of another race or culture without being a racist?

38. Can an individual of one race dislike the actions or attitudes of a group of persons of another race without being racist?

Social Order/Communal Or Tribal Living

39. Does a single leader or a committee have ultimate say on the mores, rules, sharing work and resources, punishment and reward, within the tribe or commune?

40. If a single ruler, is his word absolute? Or does he rely on a constitution, or the approval of a subordinate advisory committee?

41. Since in any population of “diverse” persons, there will always be a percentage who disagree with the ruling cliques, how will those who rebel against the system be dealt with? Banishment (by force, deadly if needed?) or Imprisonment (by force, deadly if needed?)

42. Would ‘brain-washing’ or massive propaganda efforts be allowed to inculcate children into the system so they would be less likely to rebel against it as adults?

43. Since diversity is the goal of any right thinking community, what will happen if any portion of the population starts any elitist endeavor, such as forming a club, new religion, or even invent and play a sort in which everyone doesn’t have an equal chance at winning, or tries to educate their children in a moral or social manner with is not officially sanctioned?

Personal Responsibility

44. Do you drive a car of other motorized vehicle?

45. Do you take public transport?

46. Do you ride a bicycle or other manually powered mode of transport?

47. Do you live in a house?

48. Do you currently draw from the power grid?

49. Do you take, or have you ever taken, any life-saving or life-sustaining medication?

50. Have you ever been in a hospital?

51. If you come down with a major illness, would you prefer to consult a Western style medical doctor, an African witch-doctor, or a set of crystals that have energized by an alien?

52. Essay question: list the products used in the manufacture of a bicycle, then enumerate in chronological sequence of it’s manufacture. It is truly “Green?” (Chrome – mining, transportation, mass production: paint: paint sprayer – subset of mechanical devices such as airbrush, hoses, air pump, electricity for pump and brush. Chemicals for clean up. disposal of overflow product waste, i.e., transport, storage or disposal facility . . . Rubber, collection, transportation,

Even the seemingly eco-friendly bicycle is tainted by the capitalist system. Consider the following,

Bicycles are made in factories. Their production entails, as a minimum, the following intrusive actions in regards to Mother Earth: Mining for metal for the body and wheel rims (and the chrome as well), refinement of metal, a factory for machining, stamping and/or bending metal parts; the welding of metal parts (another factory for welding equipment); another factory for the production of nuts and bolts, plastic seats, handle bar grips, paint (another factory operation); yet another factory for the mass production of nuts and bolts, a factory for mass production of tools that manipulate nuts and bolts, pumps for getting air into the tires and a transport system to deliver the goods. It is assumed that a bureaucracy would also exist for dealing with workers and the payroll system which pays them.)

Then answer the question, Is the bicycle truly green?

53. Since the list of needs involved in animal transportation includes such things as veterinarians to ensure the animals can exist in a healthy, productive state for the maximum amount of time, a system of uniform institutional training them for the standardization of the best veterinarian services: construction of treatment facilities or means of delivering all equipment, medicines and doctor to the animals, the cleaning up of mass feces in public places where human contact is maximized and disease prevention through cleanup, disposal, sanitizing, etc., do you think a return to animal transportation will serve society better than gasoline powered vehicles?

54. Who determines the precise limits that the animals can be worked (number of hours worked per day, load carried per animal, discipline or instructive techniques for etc.) and the types of animals, as well as their age for working (how young can they be put to labor, are they retired at any age, or expected to die in the harness?)

55. How are they chosen to the post/position?

56. How are those who fail to obey their dictates dealt with?

Evil Profit

57. Do you believe a barter system is the best way for human communities to exchange products and services. (for example: If female, will you take three ears of corn for a blow job?)

58. Should all salaries (even in an economy based on barter) be equal?

59. Should a garbage collector receive the same wages as a neuro surgeon?

60. Do CEOs receive too much money for their jobs?

61. Do Hollywood actors receive too much money for their jobs?

62. Do Rock and Roll stars receive too much money for their jobs?

63. If everyone should be guaranteed a “living wage,” how is the living wage determined? And by whom?

64. Define ‘poverty level’, ‘standard of living,’ and ‘living wage.’ Define “rich.” Define “poor.” What should a ‘poverty level family be given by the workers in America? Insurance, shelter, medical aid, . . . everything but a meaningful existence.

65. Filtering out all lessor causes, are urban street gangs the result of institutional racism come home to roost? Or a side effect of liberal giveaways, like the Great Society?

66. Do you ho’s, bitches and G’s think fucking free speech is being suppressed in America by da Man?

67. Should a living wage be determined by family size? (For example, a clerk at Mickey D’s who has seven kids should receive a greater annual wage than a dentists with one kid).

68. Should an actor or singer receive wages commensurate with a school teacher’s earnings? A doctors’?

69. Who should set the rate for wage – assuming you’re against the “free market” setting them – for various jobs?

70. Do you currently have any sort of job, and if so, do you think it would be fair if all the employees in your company, from CEO to janitor, make only minimum wage?

71. Define the following: Fairness; Greed; Obscene profit; Windfall profit

72. What distinguishes profit from profit margin?

73. What should the maximum profit margin be for any business?

74. What is the average profit margin for the following industries: oil production; drug industry; automotive industry; electronics industry; leading software companies.

An Individual’s Right To Self Protection

75. In your ideal world, will individual citizens be allowed to have weapons for self protection?

76. If not, then what will you use to disarm them?

Saving The Earth

77. The current population of humans on this planet is six billion and counting: Make a list of the groups or types of persons you think are either evil, backwards thinking, or that are currently a detriment to peace and world harmony and that we could do without. Be specific in explaining why, for example, you’d chose welfare deadbeats and those with extensive criminal histories over business owners and honor roll students.

78. Since persuasion has not worked in making every one in the world think like an American college-educated progressive (and, given the obvious truths of human psychology, this isn’t likely to ever happen,) are you willing to use force, even deadly force, to bring others into your view of how best to establish world peace and harmony, end poverty, end racism, clean up the ecology, feed the poor and hungry?

79. What would you say your predominant moral system is? Should everyone agree with you on this and should your understanding of social mores, government, history and so forth, be the standard for everyone?

80. If not, is there an historic (or mythic) individual who you think the standard should be based on? (Example: Jesus, Buddha, Mohammad, Jimmy Carter, Gandhi, John Lennon, Garfield, etc.)

81. Why aren’t you living up to this standard? And if you aren’t, how can you demand anyone else be?

82. If you were president of the United States, how would you enforce your beliefs about the preservation of the ecology and the use of non-renewable energy sources in other countries who are not swayed by your sentiments or arguments? Would you be willing to use force against them in an effort to ‘save the earth.’”

Time To Put Your Platitudes To Work

So, as a liberal you believe in diversity, and embellishing and protecting diversity? Well, I’m as different from you as a snake is from a grasshopper; so put your useless platitudes to work and respect my diversity by leaving me the hell alone? If I were a poor black African Islamic who believes in cutting the clitoris’ off my infant daughters, beating my wife, sexing my goats to keep them happy, and raising my sons to be violent, illiterate fanatics like myself, I can guaranteed you’d respect my diverse cultural differences. Well, I’m a moderately educated white gun-toting southern male whose intrinsic belief-system is that American liberals are anathema to freedom and individuality; hence, compared to a lesbian ‘progressive’ with a degree in Indigenous American Pottery from Cal Tech, I’m your antipode. In respect to a modern American liberal, it doesn’t get any more diverse than that. So why don’t you protest in support of my diversity? My right to eat my cultural foods (anything fried or barbequed), perpetuate the beliefs of my forefathers (you don’t work; you don’t eat). If you don’t start respecting my diversity, one day you’ll find my size 12 D carbon footprint up your ass!

{ 10 comments… add one }
  • Steve August 18, 2008, 3:45 pm

    2 much lik school

  • Abu Tito August 18, 2008, 7:10 pm

    Dammit, Mahone. How dare you ask such insensitive questions? Of course Da Man suppresses free speech – they wouldn’t let my brother record “Blue Bell Boy” nor ‘Five Little Snowmen.” They said something about his backup singers – a junior chorus.

  • TUXETOTED August 18, 2008, 7:26 pm


  • Mahone August 18, 2008, 7:46 pm

    Steve: I hear you, dude. Unfortunately, those assholes in school who sucked up to the system are the same ones now milking us. Pelosi was a hippie. Have you every been around hippies, engaged them in “deep” conversation? Cool. Pelosi is here to “save the planet.” But who will save us from her? I think we’re safer in the hands of a common criminal like Hilary Clinton. (Is Hillary two L’s or one? I forget. I wish I could forget her.)

  • Mahone August 18, 2008, 7:47 pm

    Abu Tito: good to hear from you again. Snowmen? I’d be more worried if he called them his creampuff boys. I just bet Michael would like to grab hold of Obama’s ears . . .

  • Mahone August 18, 2008, 7:49 pm

    Tuxetoted: Hell, I’ve gotten blow jobs for just a Dairy Queen hamburger. Hmmm, wonder what a corn suffle’ would get you? Tebagging?

  • JimJam12 August 20, 2008, 12:16 pm

    mama earths resorses r 4 natural earth people like lions and tigers and snakes and stuff. so called men r like descended from space monkeys an shouldnt b here.

  • Mahone August 21, 2008, 1:55 am

    JimJam: Earth’s resourses are for natural animals? I guess that’s why the La Brea tar pits were so much fun for the saber-toothed tigers and mastadons. Personally, I think that by using up as much oil as possible we are saving countless of mother earths creatures — even though we may be frustrating the efforts of future archaelolgists. With her constant vulcanism, tornados, hurricanes and what not, mother earth can be a real bitch to her children some time.

  • Libby Murray October 1, 2010, 1:03 pm

    drum sets made by pearl are nice sounding and tough too;-“

  • Mahone Dunbar October 1, 2010, 10:55 pm

    libby, I remember Pearl Drums from before they produced a high quality product. I use vintage mainly, Camcos and Ludwigs being my fav’s, and also make my own drum sets.

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